The Consistent Coach Podcast

The Real Cause of Burnout

May 31, 2020 Stacie Mitchell Episode 1
The Consistent Coach Podcast
The Real Cause of Burnout
Chapters
The Consistent Coach Podcast
The Real Cause of Burnout
May 31, 2020 Episode 1
Stacie Mitchell

Today, Stacie digs into the real cause of burnout and how to heal it. You'll learn the three components of burnout, what burnout feels like, and how to escape the burnout cycle. If you're ready to heal your burnout for good, this episode is for you.

Show Notes Transcript

Today, Stacie digs into the real cause of burnout and how to heal it. You'll learn the three components of burnout, what burnout feels like, and how to escape the burnout cycle. If you're ready to heal your burnout for good, this episode is for you.

Podcast Notes: What is burnout?

Research shows there are three components to burnout:

  • Emotional exhaustion
  • Depersonalisation
  •  A lack of personal accomplishment

And I do agree. My personal definition is exhaustion to the point of wanting to quit. This usually comes from experiences where you feel a lack of control, where your problems seem too big, where you’ve lost your connection to the work, or where you overworked to the point of exhaustion. 

When you’re burned out you might feel fuzzy or drained or like your work is pointless. You might feel ineffective or like you want to run away from your life. You might feel overwhelmed, stressed out, and worn down by life. 

However, the normal prescription for burnout is stress management, time management, self care, or changing careers, or taking a sabbatical. All of these may help, especially short term, but they don’t fix the underlying cause.

If you want to get rid of burnout for good...

The big secret is: Burnout is caused by your BRAIN. 

And until you fix what’s going on in your brain, your burnout cycle will continue.

Let me explain: 

The biggest thing I see over and over that is causing burnout: The resistance you feel about your job. 

Resistance is spending every day thinking:

  • “I don’t want to do this anymore.”
  • “My boss sucks.”
  • “I hate my team.”
  • “There’s too much to do, I can’t handle this.”
  • “This isn’t the right job for me.”
  • “I’m working harder than anybody else.”
  • “I’m the one who always has to do the work.”
  • “I never want to do this again.”
  • “I can’t leave work on time because they’ll think I’m lazy….or I won’t get promoted….”
  • “I can’t say no because I’ll get fired.”
  • And the biggest one that really makes people feel just awful and so emotionally drained is:  “I don’t have a choice.” This thought -- I don’t have a choice -- reinforces the feeling of being a victim, it reinforces hopelessness, and it reinforces how trapped and tired you feel.

Consider how these thoughts make you feel every day. Is it any wonder that you are completely and totally exhausted by your work? 

Let me tell you my story:

It wasn’t so long ago that I was promoted into the role I’m in now, and I was bawling my eyes out on the phone with my newly hired career coach. 

I wanted OUT of the job I’d been promoted into.

I was stressed out, I was exhausted, and the work just didn’t light me up. 

I *thought* I had to leave the job to feel better. I thought that was the only way.

But it *wasn’t*. I’m still in that job. And I started a business I love, and I excel at work, and it feels like a miracle. 

My job didn’t suddenly get easier, but my brain made it FEEL easier. I stopped viewing the job as a trap, and started to view it as a training ground for becoming who I want to be. 

It’s really easy to coach around burnout by helping people leave their jobs. 

It feels super good to escape what you think is the big, bad scary monster in your life. BUT -- it’s way more powerful and life-changing to help clients heal their burnout without changing their circumstances. 

When my clients learn that they have a choice, a powerful choice, that they can make every day about WHY they are staying in their jobs, their perspectives start to shift.

What used to send them over the edge is now seen as a challenge.

What used to keep them up at night doesn’t have the same power anymore.

When you can learn to overcome any circumstance in your life, that’s when amazing things happen.

And before you say, “Stacie, you have no idea what you’re  talking about…”, let me just say:

I’ve been you. I’ve cried on my drive home from work, I’ve been told by my husband that I had to quit because I was so unhappy. I’ve even put in notice at work and then had a pandemic happen and made the choice to stay -- and was HAPPY about it even.

Because here’s the thing: I have a choice about how I feel. 

And it’s super easy to wallow in misery. But it’s not the person I want to be, and you wouldn’t be in this group if that’s who you wanted to be either

If you want to heal your burnout, the best training ground to do it, is the situation that you think you can’t possibly do it in. This allows you to show up as the person you want to be RIGHT NOW - not when you get a new job.

Because your brain and your thinking follow you EVERYWHERE. They’ll be right there with you when you start a business, start a new career, ANYTHING new that comes along, your thinking will be there with you.

And the new thing that you wanted so badly once, will become the thing that burns you out once again. Because you never got to the root of the problem in the first place.

And this is true whether you overwork and work too many hours, whether you just feel overwhelmed, or anxious, whether you need to be assertive or put more boundaries in place, or if you’re a people pleaser or a perfectionist --- all of these behaviors start in your brain and they must be fixed in your brain.

So while burnout may be a complex issue -- the solution is simple and coaching can help you solve it.

If you’re ready to feel better, to stop feeling like you must escape as quickly as possible, if you want your energy back, coaching can help you. It won’t be easy, and it will take some work on your part, but you can feel better now.  

And know that healing your burnout is crucial for figuring out if you want a new career, because you may decide you want to do something different after you’ve healed your burnout. But making that choice when you’re burned out, fuzzy, and lacking energy is NOT the best time to do it. Let’s get your mind clear FIRST, and THEN we can do the work on what might be next. 

Also know this: being happy in your current situation doesn’t mean that you have to be complacent -- you can feel good AND go after something different. 

So many of my clients fear that if they don’t feel miserable, they’ll stop trying for something new. Let me say: that is not the way you want to go!

Complacency also starts in your brain. There is no rule that you must be miserable to change your life. In fact, it’s way easier to change your life when you don’t feel like crap.